Loving a friend after a fight...

No, I haven't had a big fight with a friend. But this was the title of a message I taught a few weeks ago.

A few people asked for the “defining questions” we should ask in the aftermath of a conflict. Here they are:

1. Which is more important: to be right or the relationship?
(Note, there are some times when the issue is that important.)

2. How significant will this issue be in a week, a month, a year, or in five years?

3. What do you want this relationship to look like in a year?

4. What was “my part” in the conflict? What did I do and say that added to the problem?

5. Is this a healthy friendship? Is it dangerous? Do I need different boundaries?
(We can’t be best friends with everyone. It’s important to choose healthy close
relationships.)

6. What is the other person thinking and feeling? How do they view the issues?

7. Do I still believe the best and want the best for the other person? Why or why not?

Answering these questions help give us perspective and direction for our next steps.

If you are interested in the rest of the message... go to www.crosswindschurch.com
and you can listen to past messages including this one. The series was called "Tough Times Love" and included Loving a friend going through divorce, ...who has lost a job, ...who is depressed, and ...after a fight.


One last thing... I know it's been a year. Maybe I'll write more. And maybe not...